Wrecking Yards
by YouShotAcrossMySky
Summary: Sometimes it's not love, it's not perfect and it doesn't work. Sometimes it is and we just don't want to admit it. Sometimes we want to be everything and we just can't. A broken girl and the boy she drags down with her. There is still treasure left in us.
1. A Scratch In The Usual

This story is about high school and teenagers and trouble.  
>It's got real issues that I tried to represent to the best of my abilities.<br>These teenagers do a lot of things they shouldn't. I'm not condoning their behaviour, I'm simply being realistic. If this bothers you, feel free to exit out.  
>I don't think it will be happy and silly and something to laugh at. Nor do I think it will make you cry.<br>They say write what you know, what I know is blunt honesty and cynical commentary.  
>I am not a writer, I wish I was, but I'm not.<br>The characters names and any other related twilight clichés belong to the wonderful author. I just screw them up and give them flaws anyways.  
>Review if you like it and you want it continued, please.<p>

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><p>The first time I see him we're on the bus to school.<p>

I'm sitting among the usual crowd, I have the usual distant eyes and everyone else is doing their usual sad display.

As we all go about our usual routines, the dreary Tuesday morning is numbingly, predictably usual.

Until it's suddenly not, the girls around me all shift and tear their eyes away from whoever is droning on at the time while the boys tear their eyes away from whichever girl their focused on this morning and their faces harden at the new development, at the new boy.

I roll my eyes and look out the window, I don't need another boy around, I don't need the drama that will come with it. I sit there as they all flutter and gossip, staring through the drizzle and trees and seeing absolutely nothing.

"Bella" a sharp voice calls me from my reverie.

Rosalie, of course. Rosalie scares people, Rosalie makes people jump to attention when she calls them. Rosalie is the only who is ever brave enough to demand my attention.

My eyes slide lazily over to her.

"Yes, Rosalie?" I drawl, sitting up slightly straighter and staring the blonde girl down.

Her hesitation lasts only a second and I'm impressed enough to listen to her next words

"We have a new student"

I see what she's really saying and I struggle to keep my face blank and my voice cold "no, I don't want to fuck him. Is that all?"

A smooth voice laughs and a form sits beside me. No one ever sits beside me.

"Well that's certainly a pity, are you sure I can't change your mind?"

I look over and I see green eyes, crazy hair and a little smirk. I look over at him and feel a flutter in my stomach as I register the feeling that's been absent for what feels like a long time.

Interest. He interests me, right from the start and it terrifies me.

I don't answer him; no one would expect me too anyway. I look away, back out the window, but this time my mind is turning.

The girls in front of me nervously scramble forward to cluck at the new boy, trying to cover for the rude reception I've given him.

Usually the girls would treat this situation as a public shunning, they'd insult and jeer and bring the victim down while casting me smug looks, vying for approval. Today they're stuck though, too sycophantic to insult me to my face, too desperate to reject the new boy to his.

The simple truth of high school is that it's all about power. You either approve of someone or you don't, they either choose to care about your opinion, or they choose not to. All these decisions though, are influenced by everyone else's decision; no one has their own opinion.

Most people give approval freely, with no conditions or integrity. No screening process, instant acceptance. This ensures, in most cases, that they'll get approval back.

If the approval isn't returned, and someone doesn't like you, it can go in one of two ways. The pack deems them inferior to you, and you don't need their support. Or they're considered 'cooler' than you and you're forced to fight, sacrifice and scramble to get in their good favour.

Ultimately, high school is a food chain. Anarchy only occurs when one person decides they can take another's spot.

I'm well aware that few girls like me, they're equally aware that I'm indifferent to them. Unfortunately, fate and genetics have put me higher on the food chain then them, and no one is brave enough to aim for my place.

Pity, I certainly wouldn't fight for it.

I don't see tress flying past as I gaze out the window, but rather teenage girls crawling over each other on an unstable rope ladder. Slipping and stumbling and stepping all over themselves.

"Bella!" Rosalie calls.

I turn my head slowly, easing from daydream, to find two green eyes and a wide smirk staring back at me. The bus is stopped and almost empty, Rosalie is paused in the doorway, holding it open and watching me impatiently. The new boy is still sitting next to me, smirking. Always smirking.

"After you, Bella" he gestures, indicating I should scoot over his lap. I don't scoot.

I stand with my bag and push past his knees, turning to catch his eye as I go.

"Isabella" I insist firmly.

His smirk only grows impossibly more crooked.

"Edward Cullen"


	2. Books and Balloons

Traffic stats say a lot of people read the first chapter. A lot of those people put the story on alert.  
>But not one review.<br>I don't need heaps; I'm not looking for it to be a really popular story. I just want constructive criticism. Acknowledgement. Help?  
>I haven't really been sure to upload this chapter, I wasn't sure if anyone was even going to read it anymore, maybe you all hated it or didn't particularly like it enough to care. But I want to tell this story. I got one PM from a lovely lady who suggested I not have Bella ramble in her head as it slowed the story down, but that's kind of a key, unavoidable part of Bella's personality.<br>I have chronic insomnia so when I update it's usually middle of the night here in Australia.

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><p>Chapter 2<p>

He was all anyone talked about that day.

They didn't bother lowering their voices around me; they didn't expect me to notice or care.  
>They knew I'd talked to him though. They wanted to know what he was like and they were daring each other to just ask me.<p>

Their curiosity was strong, but apparently not overwhelming enough to drive them to talk to me. They all told each other it was out of respect for me, fear of my disdain. I couldn't help but think they all really thought I was a freak and that's what stopped them from approaching me.

I saw the hot topic in the halls; he was inescapable, smiling at girls, laughing with boys. Charming and bonding like it was so easy to do.

I wonder if he really is as special as they all say. I doubt it, from my experience the world was carbon copies of the same person. Different traits were more extreme in some people, but overall, originality and personality did not exist. It made me wonder why a new person was anything special at all. Edward Cullen was a new edition of the same book. Same old story, shiny new cover, cleverly advertised. Nothing very special at all.

I wondered why these people preferred some company over others, how could people differ so greatly? Mostly I wondered what inspired love. If people weren't so different, what trait was so extraordinary that people wanted to hold onto it forever. Maybe soul mates are exact replicas, the same edition of the book. People saw themselves in another cover, and self-love spurred them to love each other.

I suppose that theory rules out me ever being in love. No self-love, no love.

"Ms Swan" a voice interrupted.

I looked up to find Mr Tedesco looming over me, I blinked up at him.

"Yes sir?" I queried, waiting for him to continue and ask whatever it was he interrupted for.

He continued to stare "Aren't you going to apologise? When you offend someone you should apologise."

I stared at him for a few beats, processing his words. "I wasn't aware you were offended."

His face was strange, disbelieving.

"Is it a lack of understanding or a lack of the ability to care that I'm seeing here?" He demanded turning slightly pink..

All of the above sir. Thank you for noticing and highlighting it to everyone else in the room.

Internally I simmered; outwardly I smiled at him "I'm very sorry sir." I chanted.

He huffed and turned to leave, I returned my eyes to the window.

Sometimes I feel like a cloud: floaty and vague, transparent and intangible. I'd distort and move around, forming shapes, trying to be something better, trying to be seen as anything but a cloud. Just trying to be real, but all anyone ever saw was the same cloud, pretending to something else, playing charades.

I once saw a cloud perfectly shaped like a bird, mid-flight. Its wings spread wide open. Now I wonder if it was another lost girl, trying to fly, trying to be seen as something more, achieving nothing more than a few smiles, no one gave her the wings she wanted.

I never tried to fly, being a bird was ambitious. I felt more like a balloon; confined, insubstantial, empty. Always, running out of air and sinking to the ground.

"Bella" Someone hissed, breaking me from the vision of a faded, deflated balloon, spiralling uncontrollably towards the ground.

I slowly cocked my head. Emmett was sitting behind the person next to me, Emmett was whispering to me.

Emmett and I had conversations, he pretended better than most people at this school.

"Third period and your already far gone. I can't wait until the weekend when there is actually a reason for your spacing, hey! Party at Caroline's, woo! I bet you're stoked for it, no one can day dream like you Bells. No one can care less when a teacher like Teddy comes at them either, but you're the original ice princess. Doesn't give a shit about a thing, does what she wants, you think you're a badass don't you?"

Emmett talked a lot, complimenting, teasing and talking about the weekend in one breath. He'd quickly learnt that was the key to our conversations.

"Badass enough to take you on McCarthy" I smirked back at him, deciding on which conversation to continue. Caroline's party was standard and compliments were probably insincere anyways. Conversation was easy with Emmett, he supplied topics, I strategized and chose the easiest one to carry. I liked Emmett.

He laughed too loudly causing Mr Tedesco to throw him a disapproving look.

Emmett nodded at Mr Tedesco before leaning closer to me. "Have you met Edward?' he gestured beside him to the new boy.  
>I didn't know he was in the classroom, I turned my head to see him directly behind me, still smirking.<p>

"We briefly met, It didn't go very well, did it Isabella?" he drawled, sprawled in his chair.

This book had a very nice cover indeed.

Emmett laughed again "Yeah man, Bella is the coldest bitch you will find in this place. That's standard."

Edward's smile widened in that way it always does. "a little spit fire huh?" he winked.

I turned back around and finally pretended to give Mr Tedesco the attention he craved. He let us out early when Emmett called him Teddy to his face.

I nodded at Emmett on my way out, outwardly I pretended the new boy wasn't there, inwardly I pretended I hadn't noticed him at all.

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><p>It should be interesting soon. Hopefully.<br>let me know what you think please.


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